Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Invisible Illness...A Catch 22

Never judge a book by its cover. I may smile, put make up on, fix my hair, and put on my "I'm ok" face, but it’s the only way I can try and get through the day. The reality is that I am really not ok today, but I try my VERY hardest to pretend or convince myself that I am, just to get through the physical and mental pain.

It is so hard when people only assume you’re sick when you look sick and disheveled. If you appear pretty with a smile and look like you are enjoying life then you must feel fine. This is the problem with invisible illness. I REFUSE to sit at home indefinitely feeling gloomy because of the hand I have been dealt. Don't get me wrong I have my days! If I let myself,  others would simply say I need a better attitude and need to put myself together and I would feel better. Not to mention who wants to hang out with someone who is always down. However when I do put myself together and put on a brave face others say well you look fine, you look happy and healthy.

I work so hard every day to keep a positive attitude not only because I want to try to live a happy life but because it is also very important with my illness to help keep it under control. I work hard to look nice when I go out because it helps me feel a little like the old me, and I also have a handsome hubby I want to look good for to remind him I am still me… not just a patient.

It is so important to remember that just because someone comes off as strong it doesn't mean there isn’t something wrong. We need compassion, love and understanding. Luckily, I am very blessed to have many people in my life that support and understand my daily struggle and for that I am so grateful.